Superlove Me!

“Hello, Sir what would you like to order?” says the feeling to heart that come to his store. “Hi, I would like a non-fried emotions, no tears with extra caring and a cup of love please.”
The feeling start to put in numbers in his cash register, “Would like that love to be doubled? Only 1 additional attention; comes with free smile for every purchase this month only.” And the heart replied briefly: “Yes please, superlove me!”
Life is like a nice fast food restaurant if we ever play with our imagination. Heart is often hungry for love and they want it to be double up. Heart cannot judge what is wrong or right, less or more, forever or temporary if it collides with loving someone. We are frequently drifted away with the thoughts of greener pasture when our feelings being abandoned or even abused by someone we truly love.

The weakness of our flesh and bones tend to speak the truth of our humanity. The desire within burst like a flame and gasoline poured over and over by the ego inside. We cannot be blamed when we want something better for our live, want us to be happy and smile over the cloudy day outside, sing a love song in our head even though no music is playing. All we want is security and a glimpse of the future that we will be happy and being loved eventually.

So please, superlove me!

Another Day in Paradise ..

What is the plan? The great piece to the puzzle. Each and every face I see here today is looking for a purpose or got lost in a cause. Where we, the weak willed intoxicate our doubts in a pool of drunken misery that seems to get older every single time. Yeah, I'm feeling down, cause here I am, in the sweaty and noisy bustling reality within the midst of a busy city waiting to meet another perpetual wrestle for the promise of another dream.
Particularly because I just got back to this harsh reality on Monday, from a blissful paradise-like state of being in Phuket. Deep sigh... thats what life should be like, cooling off in the pool from the beautiful soaring heat or laying under the sun to get some color in my skin to ward off my ghostly tan-less image while the serene voice of the ocean calms your nerves and melds your worries... so far away from bills, frills and all of those overrated thrills.
So, here I am, back in the clockwork and churning that vicious cycle of a wheel... waiting for my next escape to another paradise. Bali anyone?

Unrequited Love <3

A reciprocated reply would make a world of difference, but this unrequited love has sapped the light out of you, now everything doesn't matter anymore. Taking its toll on you, as every misleading beacon in the midsts of this mist sends a happy spree of hope like a surge of dope into your veins, and the withdrawal seems to kill a little bit of you every time.
This happiness is a drug and in its depression is the only comfort it can offer. How much before you break? How many breaks before you can muster the strength and declare that you had enough? or How long more can you wait before you tell that person how you really feel? For love that is one way, it is to love, but to love in vain... Get the rejection out of the way and move on with life, wallow in this misery and taste the bitterness of loneliness. But what if the love is requited? I guess you'll never know till you try, so wear your heart on your sleeve before it is too late, realize the fear that your throbbing heart may eventually cool and be shielded by a wall of ice built by an architect of pain. And it will take a tremendous amount of amourous heat to melt that coldness away, if ever you are to love again.
(Dedicated to one of my readers who requested a writeup on a one-way love affair)

love iS ...

Love, love is a verb
Love is a doing word



I always think it should be my time to move on and open my heart again. After so many wound and painful experience I know I cannot quit here and now. So I give myself a chance to see maybe fate will lead me to the right door this time. Unee, you know who I’m talking about, gurl…


Teardrop on the fire
Feathers on my breath


He’s nice, gentle, very sweet but sometimes annoying. He really cares for me throughout my days, calls, text messages are pouring like water on my sunny day. He act jealous even though we’re not having any string attached, but from there I could see his seriousness.



In the night of matter
Black flowers blossom


But then, things just getting awkward. Just about the time I trust him and trust my instinct, he suddenly backing off. Pulling away and suddenly shutting down his system like we meant nothing. Another heart is broken, another memory is open. He’s gone and I’m sitting there alone.



Feathers on my breath
Teardrop on the fire of a confession



PS. I still love Batik. Somehow.

Sunset. Red was having a fight with blue and yellow as to whom should occupy the larger space of the endless sky.
Vast. The sea was trying to be calm amidst the strong wind.
Cold. Warm was being pushed away by the vicious coldness.
Gloomy. Happiness was trying its very best to overcome a stronger feeling named loneliness.

Me. I was at the middle of everything.
Me. I was watching as the sunsets.
Me. I was one with the sea as it tries to be calm.
Me. I was shivering as coldness drives warm away.
Me. I was trying my VERY best to overcome this loneliness.
Why? Now I ask myself...
Why did I chose to be alone?
Why did I chose to be so far away from my friends?

Three years ago, I wanted to be far away from the city. Far from blinking lights, far from the noise, far from the busy streets, far from everything that would remind me of a stressful life. That was THREE YEARS AGO...

Now after three years of spending life here in the island of Palawan, I am asking myself was it worth everything?... A few days back my friends were here. They had their time out of the city life and so they decided to pay me a visit. It was a very, very short time... Three days... Three days of being together (again)... Three days of reminiscing... Three days of laughs... Three HAPPY DAYS!

Three days is already over... Now I look back to three years... And as I look back, memories played at the back of my mind... images were flashing... silence came... and then (unnoticed) tears falls down my face...


...tatlong araw lang pala ako naging maligaya di ko man lang napuna tatlong araw ko'y tapos na...